Fuck Christmas

I imagine most of you will or have seen this, but just in case, I’m linking it here too.

This entry was posted on Friday, December 16th, 2005 at 6:38 pm and is filed under Media. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

         

2 Responses to “Fuck Christmas”

1. lotsamark Says:
   December 17th, 2005 at 5:06 pm

   Thanks for the link, Dave. You can tell I’m a liberal because I get a kick out of gratuitous cursing. We turn our outrage into comedy.

   I work in retail, and have seen ripples of this xmas war in my store. Several times this season, I have seen customers correct myself and other employees after we wish them “Happy Holidays”. The customer (always a male) will retort, “Merry Christmas” and hold eye contact just long enough for us to feel threatened, before turning around and walking out triumphant. I always reply, “Thank you, Merry Christmas to you, too” just to let him think he’s freed me from my SatanCo corporate shackles. Maybe he’ll go home and write a thank you email to the O’Lie-ly Factor for saving Christmas. Maybe O’Lie-ly will read his story of my conversion on-air. That would be a Festivus miracle!

   Mind you, at my store, our corporate overlords have not given us one word of instruction on how to refer to the holidays. We say “Merry Christmas” and “Happy Holidays” all day. There’s a four-foot tall picture of a chocolate Santa Claus in the store window. There are Christmas ornaments all over the store, and the music system blares songs about Christ’s birth all day. We have about ten boxes of chocolates in the whole store with decorations for Hannukah (Tallahassee retail does not see huge Hannukah gift sales).

   And Joe Dirt has to get all uppity about me wishing him a happy holiday season. I was just being nice to the dickheads! I’ve been tempted to wish them Happy Hannukah or Kwanzaa just in retaliation. Maybe I’ll just start wishing everyone a Happy Festivus. Yeah!

2. Administrator Says:
   December 20th, 2005 at 12:36 pm

   You should wish everyone happy festivus for the rest of the season. If they give you a weird look, you can do your best Jerry Seinfeld and go into a “What’s the deal with crazy right wingers…” shpiel.

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